Solitary Life

My early morning view
Well, Chris finally got himself moved to the condo in Port Townsend. Well, almost moved. He still has a few things here, including the boat, which will stay as there isn't anywhere up there for him to keep it. Besides, it looks nice here at the dock. But he says he is going to sell it...
I realized through all this upheaval that I really don't want to live on my own, regardless of where it is. Even though Chris and I were at loggerheads a lot of the time, it was company, somebody here. When Ryan and Cody were little, throwing tantrums or being naughty to get attention, we used to say, "A soggy potato chip is better than no potato chip," and that sort of applies in my situation. Now it's just me and the cats and I just don't want to become the old lady stuck away somewhere with a whole bunch of cats and nothing else. I keep thinking how fun and romantic it would be if living in this cute little house in this beautiful setting - with some wonderful, handsome, wealthy man who absolutely loves me to death! Actually, I wouldn't mind even having a woman room mate! As I look outside now, it is crystal clear, early morning, high tide, a reasonable temperature and supposed to get up to 70+ today, and I know that there are very few places in the world like this. And when I leave here, I will miss it. 
The nut biz was very nutty there for a while and has slowed down considerably, which financially is not good, but actually is giving me breathing room to do other stuff that has been put on the back burner. We started doing the variety packs and Annie likes them so much that now the programmers are working on the site to make it possible for customers to have their own mixes in the small bags. They are a real pain to make, so the prices are going to be considerably higher. It took me a while to figure out how to do this, but in the end it is turning out to be quite simple as it is all done in the database. The hardest part is going to be the packing! 
I had hoped to get the WSDA food facility processing permit here but it would take a remodel on the house to do that. So with the new small packs, and corporate interest in big orders, I am starting to look at small warehouse/office space. There aren't many around and it would mean I would be "going to work" if we did that. The company has been asked to be the "nut vendor" at the Port Townsend Wooden Boat Festival in September, which will be fun. The Festival is huge now, and very well know around the country so it is a good way of getting the name out there. 
Doing my research on the countries I might want to live and Nicaragua and Honduras are high on the list at the moment. Honduras is having political problems so have to keep an eye on that. Last Saturday at the Farmers' Market, a guy was selling a VW camper, in really good shape and I thought (not too seriously) about getting one later down the road and making the drive down to Central America to check out the countries. It would be an amazing adventure but I would not want to do it on my own. Twenty years ago I would have.
I hate having to admit - and accept - the fact that I am getting older and that my "medical issue" slows me down a bit. Of course, my mind still thinks of me as 18 - until I look in the mirror and go - "Holy shit! Who is that!" And I think of all the women who have stuff "done" and don't want to go there. I hate pain! So it's looking life and facts head on and accepting what is, is. YUCK! Damn, that really sucks!